world cup

JAPAN STRIKER PRAISES SINGAPORE'S FOOTBALL PERFORMANCE

In an interview with the media, Japanese striker Keisuke Honda described his disappointment with the result of Japan's match against Singapore, but gracefully heaped praises on the Singapore side. "The result was what it was, so there’s nothing we can do about it,” said Honda, who hit the crossbar from a free kick midway through the second half. “If anything, I think they took it easy on us."

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WORLD CUP WINNING GERMAN FOOTBALL TEAM IS LIKE SG EDUCATION SYSTEM?

In contrast, I wonder what Andy Chen, the ST deputy editor who compared Germany’s recent success to Singapore’s education system will say to Singapore’s very own Goal 2010 – the exciting aim to get the Lions to appear in their first World Cup Finals ever. Did our education system produce a nation of quitters who dissipate at the first sight of failure instead of carrying on the goal the manner we would expect from people who went through a ‘rigorous education system that should be celebrated’?

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NORTH KOREA STATE MEDIA: OUR GLORIOUS MOTHERLAND HAS WON THE WORLD CUP

Following the end of the World Cup Final between Germany and Argentina, North Korean state media has announced their total victory at the World Cup. State media reported that North Korea thrashed Germany five goals to nil. This is all thanks to the presence of Great Leader Kim Jong Un who attended the match in Brazil. For their ultimate victory, every member of the North Korean soccer team was reportedly rewarded with a residential palace and 10 wives each.

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MINDEF: ANDY AND HIS FATHER WILL BE EXEMPTED FROM NATIONAL SERVICE

In an unprecedented move, Ministry of Defence (MINDEF) has announced Andy will be exempted from mandatory National Service. His father will also be exempted from further National Service call up cycles and phased into Mindef Reserves with immediate effect. Andy will not be required to report to Central Manpower Base once he reached 16.5 years of age, the statutory age to report for mandatory military service.

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Overexcited PRC Man Fractures Penis Following 'World Cup Sexual Abstinence'

Last Monday, a man broke his penis while passionately fooling around with his wife. The doctor's reasoning? His engine was weakened by two weeks of "World Cup sexual abstinence." The man surnamed Xu is a football fan and watched every single game since the beginning of the World Cup. He and his wife, living in Jinhua City, have been married for seven years and had a great relationship. But this perfect world collapsed last Monday morning.

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GAMBLERS IN SINGAPORE PRAISE THE PAP GOVERNMENT

This morning's (9 July) World Cup semi-final has produced one of the most extraordinary results in World Cup history. The host Brazil lost to Germany in a bizarre scoreline 7-1, its biggest defeat in their World Cup campaign. The quality of the German team is "not normal", said Brazil's coach Luiz Felipe Scolari. Despite the sorrowful atmosphere in Brazil, halfway around the globe, Singaporeans are smiling.

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