I think I have come to the point of giving up being a man.
It is depressing when I cant find a job and some recruitment events are locked in for females only. If I were to switch gender maybe I will have a better luck.
It is depressing when you look at the tuition assignments page and you see most of them asing for “female tutor”. I find that there is virually no value in being a male.
Then women treat you like you are a sicko just because you are male. I experimented with cross dressing. I went out and about. I noticed women did not treat me the same way. They had close proximity and did not keep much distance. That same day I dressed out, I went to a restaurant and the waiter pulled out a seat for me. When the day was done I made my way home tired. A man offered me his seat. Now I realise that my life is miserable because I am male.
Sometimes now I just feel like telling my wife that I want to switch over to being a female because being a male is not that attractive anymore to me. It is depressing. You can say hi to a kid and people will think you have a motive. When I was dressed out I remember saying hi and the parent asked the kid to say hi to “jie jie”. What a difference.
I thought about why men are the ones comiting crimes.
Maybe I understand. You just feel that you are a sicko just because you are branded at birth male. Men are not engaged by the society much. They are given shitty jobs. The good ones are reserved for women. The law also view a man as a prospective sex criminal if he is accused. When I am in the train and a female moves her butt towards me without seeing or sensing if anyone is behind her, I am the one who have to jump out of her way so that I dont get accused. Being a man I have to be sensitive to my surroundings. It adds extra stress in the brain. I remember how easy it was when I dressed out. Men gave me way! I didnt have to care much!
Then you read everyday of how women slam men in a lot of situations. I have no more strength. Might as well give up and join them and be a woman. If you cant win them then join them is a phrase right?
Maybe one day my wife wakes up she wont see me at home. I will be in Thailand in an operating theatre – ready to be processed into a man made female according to customised specifications.
Sorry if this post sounds depressing. I have given up being male. I am now waiting to just execute my final plans to transform. I obtained approval letters from two online dud psychiatrists in the US and the surgeon in Pattaya has already agreed to perform the surgery for THB350,000.