Someone on Reddit Singapore just compiled a list of HardTruths about being a Singaporean (or Sinkie in Internet slang) versus being a Caucasian or Ang Moh Dua Ki (AMDK – which refers to the size of their male penises).
The result? It looks like nobody’s proud to be a Singaporean.
Read the compilation here.
AMDK blow bubbles: free spirited, simple pleasures, at worst eccentric
Sinkie blow bubble: childish, siao lang, jiak ba bo sai pang
AMDK wear slipper: effortless class, stylish urban wear
Sinkie wear slipper: cheap, no sense of fashion, bad dresser
AMDK stares at girl & starts to flirt: charismatic, friendly, articulate, meaningful conversation
Sinkie stares at girl & start to flirt: hamsup, tiko, potential rapist, trying to see if u zaogeng
AMDK No Action,Talk Only: Tony, have I spoken to u abt pay rise?
Sinkie No Action, Talk Only: u cheebye I pay u to eye power? Last warning.
AMDK carry handbag: gentlemanly, caring, knows how to please women
Sinkie carry handbag: humji, henpecked, spineless
AMDK speaks up: courageous, values human rights, loves free speech
Sinkie speaks up, attention seeking, trying to be funny, potential Amos yee
Amdk walking barefoot = be one with natural, minimalist, frugal
Sinkie walking barefoot = chao beggar, get away from me, faster siam otherwise confirm ask for money, must be homeless, totally deserve it
Amdk wearing gym bag = “wow alan! you are so fit, working out at the gym again eh?”
Sinkie wearing gym bag = “alamak weixiang… fail ippt again ah? why need to go gym?”
Amdk solve pc issue = the next bill gates, genius, think out of the box. If pc spoil after awhile, good excuse to find handsome amdk again.
Sinkie solve pc issue = nerd, geek, confirm no social life. If pc spoil after awhile, must be this sinkie make spoil de, dunno how to do don’t act lah, demand compensation.
AMDK having facial hair: so handsome and manly…look so masculine!!
Me having facial hair: For god’s sake, have some personal hygiene will ya? Stop being so lazy about your personal grooming!!
AMDK at 1.75m tall: Height is just right. My type!
Sinkie at 1.75m tall: Sorry, you too short.
AMDK as Engineer at 30: He gonna go far, i can feel it.
Sinkie as engineer at 30: What do you mean you are still an engineer at 30? Most people were already managers at age 25!!
AMDK do lion dance – cultural exchange, fun, adventurous, integrating with local culture
Sinkie do lion dance – chao ah beng, must be gang member, pie kia, full of tattoo
AMDK do cultural exchange – wah, so special, respect local culture sia, so open minded
Sinkie do cultural exchange – jibai check ur privilege, asian values pls, why so basic bitch/bastard, everyday drink starbucks, you think money come from tree
AMDK create logo – innovative, original, designer, creative director, photoshop pro, good anesthetic sense.
Sinkie create logo – so obiang, must be copy from Google image de, use ms paint and do, confirm no design background
AMDK begging: knows what he wants in life, ambitious, give 100 dollars immediately
Erhu uncle begging: knn so noisy, you got hands and feet go work la, even 10 cents dont want to give
AMDK quit his job to pursue passions: adventurous, go-getter, brave soul, knows what he wants in life, so inspiring.
Sinkie quit his job to pursue passions: bum, not filial to parents (never give them part of his income), no prospect when grow up, resume gap gets questioned.
AMDK full time soldier – wow so manly, special forces, eye candy tell me your stories
Sinkie full time soldier – confirm outside no future, only know how to lepak in camp and go siam diu
AMDK in No.4 sit on MRT seat: Wah confirm commando special ops mmm so hot and muscular. Training must be soooo tiring. Glad such competent men are serving the nation.
Sinkie in No.4: Knn cb chao recroot sit on my MRT seat I STOMP u then u know ah pubor.
AMDK play Lego: what an interesting hobby, so creative and quirky, hasn’t lost his sense of childlike wonder
Sinkie play Lego: waste money, you nothing better to do is it, how old already still play Lego?
AMDK Rides bicycle to work – eco friendly and fit
Sinkie rides bicycle to work – wah no money buy car, sweaty and smelly
Amdk surf reddit: wah so updated, so cool, having an active online social life
Sinkie surf reddit: walao nothing to do huh?, go online shitpost issit?, just to shoot ppl down to let others online see u’re a grown up, not active at all in real life, keyboard warrior, post-count warrior
AMDK laugh loudly in Public: Express feelings well, appreciative of jokes, good sense of humour
Sinkie laugh loudly in Public: knn uncultured swine i stomp you la
AMDK sit outdoors at cafe: Enjoying the tropical weather, sunshine boy, wear shades look so cool
Sinkie sit outdoors at cafe: Eh, this guy siao ah, inside got seats want to sit outside, must be super sweaty and smelly
AMDK bald: fashionable, manly, clean and neat
Sinkie bald: knn chao recruit, ORD loh
AMDK selling western food: Wahhh sure authentic, sure got standard!
Sinkie selling western food: Nice meh? Sure or not?
AMDK rides bicycle : Wah so eco friendly! knows how to save money, keep fit, casual and nice toned legs.
Sinkie rides bicycle…CCB SINKIE! road blocker, poor fuck no money for a car, take your fucking ah pek bike and skinny legs and go get ram by a car, loser!
AMDK greets me in the same lift: wah so warm and friendly sia, we should learn from their culture
Sinkie greets me in the same lift: siaolang spotted
AMDK say: “Nee Howl!” Wah! So smart! Chinese so good, so respectful of other culture! Husband material!
Sinkie gets A2 for English: KNN Chow Sinkie! Stupid fuck, must be tiong from tiongland, go fucking ITE lah, you fucking beng.
AMDK smokes: OMG so MANLY, mature and rugged, rebel without a cause, must breath in his second smoke, its like indirect kissing.
Sinkie smokes: So smelly! hope your whole family die of cancer!
AMDK go dutch with girlfriend: gender equality, respecting and treating me as an equal
Sinkie go dutch with girlfriend: no money don’t ask me out for date lah
AMDK bring girl to Kopitiam for date: wow! he’s making an effort to integrate. doesn’t splurge unecessarily. marry me and have my babies
Sinkie bring girl to Kopitiam for date: cheapo, loser. failure in life. uncultured.