MY OFFICER COMMENDED ME FOR SHITTING IN MY PANTS

Dear Editors,

I was actually commended by my commander for soiling my underwear, this is our first time hearing such thing. This is how the story goes:

We were out for a 2 day 1 night urban ops and we’re heading back to our camp from Lim Chu Kang on our very last day, we were heading back to our camp after a tiring and complex day of the thrilling urban ops. It’s was CAT 1 and we were being rushed to get up the buses to get back to our camp so we were all wet and didn’t have the time for a toilet break.

After clearing my bowels in the morning before the start of the UO training, my bowel urge came again in the late afternoon when our training was about to end, I sounded out to my sergeant and he said he will try to arrange for a toilet break after everything has ended. I thought everything was alright and I should have no problem with such a kick due to the fact that I have held my bowels for four hours before when I was in poly. As we were having our water parade at the end of the training due to some delays, there wasn’t any more kick for my bowels and I thought everything was alright. The weather started to turn bad and CAT 1 was declared shortly after, we were then rushed to our buses and got ourselves all wet.

Since it was CAT 1, traffic jams along the way was expected. As we were making our way to the buses, my bowels starts to kick in again, this time even with more pain, I didnt pay much attention to it as it wasn’t that urgent or desperate yet so I thought I could just sit down and hold it till we reach camp.

About 20 minutes into the journey, as the bus make its way up the expressway, I felt my faeces starting to push its way out of the “customs” and the pain was even more intense, pushing me to a desperate state so I decided to sound out to my sergeant to see if there’s anything he could help. He told me that he will try calling our officer to seek approval to divert the bus to the nearest toilet facility. However, my officer rejected my request saying that they do not want any unnecessary diversion as it will cause delay, I have got no other choice but to hold it in again and acted as if nothing has happened. I did inform my sergeant that since we were stuck in the jam, I am not sure whether will I be able to hold all the way back to camp. My sergeant told me to try and I just tried holding it and went back to my seat at the back of the bus.

Barely 10 minutes later, my bowels decided to start saying “hi” to me, with a unbearable sharp pain and I could feel the tip of my faeces at my anus and was just inches from my underwear. I immediately sound out to my sergeant again saying that I have got no other options left but to soil my underwear as I do not want to find a bag and shit in it as I do not want any unnecessary attention that will cause a negative impact to the SAF. My sergeant dearly agreed as there was nothing he could do already and seeing that I was in so much pain. So I sat down in a calm and relax manner while pushing my shit out into my underwear and at the same time talking with my friends. For once, my friends and sergeants were flabbergasted that I decide to take this option as we are already dirty and smelly after not bathing for a day and there was a complete silence for that few seconds while I pushed my faeces gently out onto my underwear.

After that, I do look a little embarrassed but thankfully the smell of my faeces wasn’t that stink due to the fact that our sweat and mud smell have already filled the air. I felt relieved but got to endure the discomfort of a heavy underwear as the pile of my faeces was there.

After the shower, we were told to fall in and a debrief was conducted by my officer, my officer commended me that although I may look childish or embarrassed, but at that juncture, I was already in huge pain, however he emphasised that I was brave and courageous enough to shit in my underwear instead of stripping and shit on a bag instead because in war time, or even worse, should we be held hostage or kidnapped, we wouldn’t have time to find a spot of something for us to relieve ourselves, and neither would the enemy or kidnapper find something for us or even let us to relieve ourselves so should that happen he believes that every fighting soldier will not let such pain or face adhere to their training and we should know that our underwear will be the best toilet.

And the last thing is, is our officer alright or brain damaged?

Travis
ASS Contributor

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