My husband’s grandmother died recently at the age of 91. The last couple of years were difficult as she was bedridden and fading day by day.
Certainly, she lived a fruitful life, with five children, multiple grandchildren and several great-grandchildren.
According to her wishes, the funeral arrangements followed Taoist tradition. This involved elaborate prayers, processions and folding thousands of paper ingots to send her on a comfortable journey to the afterlife. With that many offspring, one would have expected all hands on deck.
What materialised seemed to be a reflection of changing times and narrow beliefs. Several of her offspring have adopted other religions and refused to participate in any of the Taoist ceremonies, including the folding of paper ingots.
I find this a strange phenomenon. Surely, what matters must be the wishes of the deceased, rather than the beliefs of the living?
As more Singaporeans become well-travelled, no one has qualms about visiting religious landmarks, such as the Blue Mosque in Istanbul, St Peter’s Basilica at the Vatican and the Tiger’s Nest monastery in Bhutan. In fact, many plan to visit these landmarks.
As we progress in this society, we must remain tolerant of all beliefs.
Using religion as an excuse to distance oneself from religious ceremonies for a loved one seems to be a practice of double standards and the start of an intolerant approach.