SINGAPOREAN GUYS ARE LOSERS

Hey, I’ll say it. Damn right I’ll say it. Singaporean guys are losers.

What are you going to do? Are you going to call me a GCP (“Golden Cheese Pie,” a woman whose genitalia is a precious and expensive commodity)? Are you going to say that my tits are too small, or fake? Are you going to go “fap fap fap” to my pictures? Are you going to call me a slut, or say that I have a fetish for iron rods?

All of that does happen to Singaporean women. But none of that is going to happen to me, because I have a penis.

No, this is not about our earnings, our “heartland values”, how boring and emasculated we are, or our relationships with our mothers. Singaporean guys are losers because of the way we treat women.

Let me give you some context. A popular video “Shit Singaporean Girlfriends Say” was being shared on Facebook, and a girl (or a person with a seemingly female profile, you never know these days) responded with “Singaporean guys are losers.”

Here’s the video. Personally, I enjoyed it (The guy in the video totally looks like Sam, doesn’t he?). It was funny, valid and accurate caricature. There was also the sequel (check the related videos) about “Shit Singaporean Boyfriends Say,” that’s just as hilarious, if not more. Good things must be shared. This is the sort of content created by and for Singaporeans that we should all be participating in.

Anyway, this video was shared somewhere on Facebook (I won’t say where but I’m sure you can figure it out) and a girl (who appears to have recently broken up with an ex-boyfriend, judging by her profile) comes along and says, “Singaporean guys are losers.”

BOOM.

 


What’s worse – a guy hiding behind an obviously fake and undetectable account (clearly designed to surf Facebook without revealing his private life), or a guy who posts the most disgusting things in public, AND displays his wife and kids at the same time?

 

 


I can imagine the ladies clamouring for this guy already.


In both cases, the behaviour is deplorable. In the first, you might write it off as trolling. The guy has got nothing better to do with his probably-sad life. In the second, is the guy stupid, or stupid? Sometimes, I honestly feel like stupidity is more insulting than hatefulness. Because hatefulness is something we can ignore – a hateful person is trying to hurt you, and you can refuse to let him. A stupid person, on the other hand, gets his poor family and friends involved.

 

 


Singaporean men are master statisticians.


Xiaxue did a wonderful piece on this
 before, exposing the identities of several men who attacked and insulted her (and her friends) online. Absolutely delightful. I have no sympathy for any of those men. If you can’t take the heat, stay out of the kitchen. Enjoy a taste of your own medicine.

 

PS: While we’re talking about Xiaxue, I’ve personally always been a fan of her attitude. This often gets me weird stares from friends. “But you like to write intellectual stuff and she’s a bimbo!” Well, call her whatever you like. She’s making a living doing what she loves, and getting lots of free stuff (which she loves), and she can pretty much do whatever the hell she likes and still be successful on her own terms. I don’t know about you, but I call that winning at life. She can be annoying and superficial and lame and she knows it and she makes a living from it.

Nothing has changed. Disgusting Singaporean men are still disgusting Singaporean men.

 


Because grievous assault, rape and murder are hilarious.


Sure, not all Singaporean guys are messed up. Some of us are decent, thoughtful and even attractive. And Singaporean girls aren’t all angels and sunshine, either – some of them are just as stupid, superficial and hateful. Absolutely true. It’s also true that men in other countries can be even worse. No shit. But that doesn’t make Singaporean male douchebaggery any more palatable.

 

So here’s my plea to my fellow Singaporean guys – if you’re a loser, stop it. Enough lah. We can do better than this. If your friends are losers, call them out on it when they’re being losers. It’s not being a “white knight,” it’s being a decent human being. What sort of world do we want our sisters and daughters growing up in?

The next time a girl says, “Singaporean guys are losers,” really, all I can say is, “Sorry about that.”

Really lah, guys. We can do better than this.

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